I wrote this post about 18 months ago and posted on my personal social media accounts. I'm proud to now share it here.
At 22, I thought that I wanted to work in higher education but had been recently denied admission to a graduate program and was left with no real plan. As is often the case in this wonderful field, a colleague of a colleague recommended me to a private Liberal Arts College about an hour away from MSU for a last minute hall director vacancy.
I connected with Marty Stack, Alma College’s Assistant Dean of Students, and he offered to meet me the next day on MSU’s campus. We met in the loud & bustling food court in the International Center. Looking back now, I realize that it was the perfect place to meet the most passionate international educator that I would ever know!
We met for two hours and we only stopped talking so that I could go back to work. For those of you who knew Marty, he was just warming up after 2 hours! He asked great questions, shared his deep love for Alma College, the respect he held for Dean of Students Jim Kridler, and told me all about his amazing wife Maki and young daughter Marina. After 2 hours with him, a few things became clear to me... Alma College was a special place and Marty was a special man.
Thankfully, I was hired as the Newberry Hall Director and Union Board Advisor and I went from a college student one day to a Student Affairs professional the next. Over the next three years, I would grow up a lot, take on new roles & responsibilities, overcome bad “big school” habits, challenge my assumptions about how to do this work, make mistakes, start a masters program, and confirm most confidently that this was indeed the right profession for me.
Throughout those three years, Marty and Jim mentored and coached me. From our “West Wing” breakfast debriefs, to hilarious staff retreats, to traveling to OPE and GLACUHO, they made everything fun, interesting, and special. A favorite memory each year was stopping at the Mars Cheese Palace on the way to Osh Kosh. Inevitably Marty would buy a cart full of some odd assortment of cheese curds, Japanese beer, candy, and root beer. Items that I’m sure Maki would not love at home!
Marty helped me to see that Student Affairs work has to be focused on community building, belonging, and student development, and not on paperwork, programs, and college politics. He didn’t directly supervise the hall directors, but he was the most trusted colleague, listening ear, and coach we could ask for. He was the heartbeat of our team. I’m honored to have worked alongside him and Jim, Dave, Chris, Jenny, Kate, Colleen, Kirsten, Julie, Steven, Dan, Joe, Mary, Diane, Jaena, Deb, and so many others including HD’s, RA’s, and student leaders.
Marty would often tell me that I delighted him. He would also tell me that I regularly infuriated him! Marty was often frustrated by my “MSU ways”. He thought I approached confrontational situations too harshly. He was right. He told me that “MSU made me think like a cop not a community builder”. He was right. He frequently asked me to “find my WA”... or inner harmony! 20 years later, I promise that I’m still working on it Marty.
Marty loved his family with every fiber of his being. His real life love story is one for the ages. He also modeled the importance of a healthy balance of work and family time. There was no doubt that being a husband to Maki and a Dad to Marina and Kai was his most important job.
I’ve spent the last 19+ years pursuing my professional passions in higher education thanks in great part to the strong foundation I built at Alma College with Marty and Jim. I approach community building and student development now in much the same way that they nurtured at AC. I work hard to be a good colleague, caring boss, and ardent student advocate. I do it because it’s the right thing to do and I do it because they would expect nothing less of me.
Marty had a way of making you feel special. He had a way helping you find your passion and then would help to connect you with others who shared that passion. Over the years our professional circles diverged after I moved out of MI and his international work took him to Japan. But even after 19 years, I always knew that no matter, Marty was in my corner, and I was in his.
My family knows all too well how Marty’s family has been feeling since that first awful cancer diagnosis. I joined so many of you in “Marty’s Army” and I now join so many in grieving the loss of this incredible man.
Thankfully I will spend the next few days surrounded by people in Alma and undoubtedly, from around the world, grieving his loss and celebrating his legacy.
My hope for each of you is that you have Marty in your corner. If you don’t, become one for someone else. My life’s trajectory was undoubtedly changed in the most amazing ways through his influence and valued friendship. I will miss him and grieve him deeply.
Thank you mentor. Thank you friend. Thank you Marty.
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